Have You Connected With Someone Today?

I live in the San Francisco Bay Area, and as you may know, my hometown has been ordered to shelter-in-place until at least April 7. We’re the first in the country to do this. I’m not going to lie. This is a scary and uncertain time. Over the past week, I’ve observed (and experienced) intense fear, sadnessContinue reading “Have You Connected With Someone Today?”

“Sometimey” Friends

What are we to do about “sometimey” friends? I learned the term “sometimey friends” from my grandmother many years ago. The definition is pretty self-explanatory, but for the sake of this blog post: A sometimey friend is a friend who is…sometimes your friend and…sometimes not. A friend who sometimes wants to hang out and sometimesContinue reading ““Sometimey” Friends”

The Challenges of Adult Friendships

I do a lot of clinical work with middle school students. Friendship is a major component of life in middle school, and in both my clinical and personal experience, friendship at this stage of life is usually accompanied by a LOT of ups and downs. There are dramas, fights, hurt feelings, competition, mean-spirited rumors, cliques,Continue reading “The Challenges of Adult Friendships”

How Connected Are You, Really?

Years ago (circa 2010), I resisted buying a smart phone because I didn’t want to feel too “connected” to others. I didn’t want to see my emails as they arrived in my inbox all day long. I didn’t want to be able to browse Facebook while I rode the BART train. Having a cell phoneContinue reading “How Connected Are You, Really?”

Give Yourself Permission to Suck in 2020

There is a no rule that says you have to be perfect right out the gate, such as on the first day of school or work or trying a new exercise or project or undertaking. But sometimes our critics – both self-imposed and external – will tell us we don’t have the right to aContinue reading “Give Yourself Permission to Suck in 2020”

Build Your Flexible Thinking Muscles With This Simple Tool

I recently wrote about all or nothing thinking (also known as “black or white thinking”), and the negative impact that rigid, inflexible thought patterns can have on a person’s well-being. In the aforementioned blog post, I discussed mindfulness as a powerful, key tool for challenging these types of distorted thoughts. In short: by using mindfulness,Continue reading “Build Your Flexible Thinking Muscles With This Simple Tool”

The Courage to Have a “Good Enough” Holiday Season

Lots of people feel down or angst-ridden during the holiday season, and many will say that this malaise stems not from too much fruitcake consumption (surprisingly), but from our expectations – of ourselves, others, and the holidays themselves. The fact that society and the media constantly pump us full of unhealthy messages regarding how weContinue reading “The Courage to Have a “Good Enough” Holiday Season”

When Relaxing Is the Hardest Task of All

At the end of yoga class last week, as we were all transitioning to Savasana (also known as Corpse Pose, the part of class in which you lie down and allow yourself to rest and relax after a period of self-exertion) our teacher said to us: “Savasana is one of the hardest exercises we doContinue reading “When Relaxing Is the Hardest Task of All”

The #1 Tool for Challenging All or Nothing Thinking

With me it’s all er nuthin’Is it all er nuthin’ with you?It cain’t be “in between”It cain’t be “now and then”No half and half romance will do! – Lyrics by Richard Rodgers, from the musical Oklahoma! When I was in the sixth grade, my class staged a production of the musical Oklahoma! It’s amazing theContinue reading “The #1 Tool for Challenging All or Nothing Thinking”

Managing Performance Review Anxiety: Ten Guidelines for Women in Tech

2020 is less than a month away! With the end of the year (and decade) comes new chapters, new beginnings, as well as evaluations and reflections on the past six months (or “half” as they say in the tech world) at work. Performance reviews are a special season unto themselves, and they can create quiteContinue reading “Managing Performance Review Anxiety: Ten Guidelines for Women in Tech”