Give Yourself Permission to Suck in 2020

There is a no rule that says you have to be perfect right out the gate, such as on the first day of school or work or trying a new exercise or project or undertaking. But sometimes our critics – both self-imposed and external – will tell us we don’t have the right to aContinue reading “Give Yourself Permission to Suck in 2020”

Build Your Flexible Thinking Muscles With This Simple Tool

I recently wrote about all or nothing thinking (also known as “black or white thinking”), and the negative impact that rigid, inflexible thought patterns can have on a person’s well-being. In the aforementioned blog post, I discussed mindfulness as a powerful, key tool for challenging these types of distorted thoughts. In short: by using mindfulness,Continue reading “Build Your Flexible Thinking Muscles With This Simple Tool”

The Courage to Have a "Good Enough" Holiday Season

Lots of people feel down or angst-ridden during the holiday season, and many will say that this malaise stems not from too much fruitcake consumption (surprisingly), but from our expectations – of ourselves, others, and the holidays themselves. The fact that society and the media constantly inundates us with unhealthy messages regarding how we shouldContinue reading “The Courage to Have a "Good Enough" Holiday Season”

When Relaxing Is the Hardest Task of All

At the end of yoga class last week, as we were all transitioning to Savasana (also known as Corpse Pose, the part of class in which you lie down and allow yourself to rest and relax after a period of self-exertion) our teacher said to us: “Savasana is one of the hardest exercises we doContinue reading “When Relaxing Is the Hardest Task of All”

The #1 Tool for Challenging All or Nothing Thinking

With me it’s all er nuthin’Is it all er nuthin’ with you?It cain’t be “in between”It cain’t be “now and then”No half and half romance will do! – Lyrics by Richard Rodgers, from the musical Oklahoma! When I was in the sixth grade, my class staged a production of the musical Oklahoma! It’s amazing theContinue reading “The #1 Tool for Challenging All or Nothing Thinking”

Managing Performance Review Anxiety: Ten Guidelines for Women in Tech

2020 is less than a month away! With the end of the year (and decade) comes new chapters, new beginnings, as well as evaluations and reflections on the past six months (or “half” as they say in the tech world) at work. Performance reviews are a special season unto themselves, and they can create quiteContinue reading “Managing Performance Review Anxiety: Ten Guidelines for Women in Tech”

Surviving the Holiday Work Party When You Have Social Anxiety

The holidays are approaching and we all know what that means! Holiday work parties! For many, it’s a time to eat, drink and be merry with reckless abandon. For those with social anxiety, it’s a blight on the calendar, a “do I really have to?” and “maybe I just won’t go?” cringe-fest. As someone whoContinue reading “Surviving the Holiday Work Party When You Have Social Anxiety”

“Thought Records Don’t Work on Me.” The Second Secret Weapon That Interrupts Distorted Thinking

“Thought records don’t work on me.” Wanna know who said that? Me. So why did I write an entire post on how to complete a thought record last week? Because they’re an extremely important tool that can help you challenge distorted thoughts. 100 percent. AND… A thought record is not a magic pill that willContinue reading ““Thought Records Don’t Work on Me.” The Second Secret Weapon That Interrupts Distorted Thinking”

Using Thought Records to Challenge Distorted Thinking: A Step-By-Step Guide

A thought record is a major tool in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) that guides us, step by step, through the process of challenging distorted, automatic thoughts. If you’ve been following my recent blog posts, you’ll know that in order to even recognize automatic thoughts as they’re occurring, you first need to practice mindfulness. You’ll alsoContinue reading “Using Thought Records to Challenge Distorted Thinking: A Step-By-Step Guide”

A Distorted Reality is NOT a Necessity to Be Free: How Cognitive Distortions Hold You Back

Sorry, Elliott Smith. I’ve been a huge fan of yours for ages, but in this post I’m going to talk about how our distorted thoughts make us anything but free. In last week’s post, I introduced the concept of automatic thoughts and explained the CBT principle that our thoughts lead to emotions, and emotions leadContinue reading “A Distorted Reality is NOT a Necessity to Be Free: How Cognitive Distortions Hold You Back”